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14TH May 2014

I’m looking forward to the 31st of May 2014. My favourite cousin Remimah is going to celebrate her birthday evening at the Panari Hotel. She is planning an exclusive party of about 15 people. And yes I am going to be one of them; but here’s the catch, I am required to bring a plus one. A guy. Yes, one of the male species. When I was told that, I was like, “Ok, I can do that”… Which I can, but I don’t want to bring just anyone. So I have been thinking of who I want to bring with me to the party. The lucky plus one. I mean I have enough things to think about- like what I will wear, what I’ll do to my hair, and what birthday gift to get my cousin- to worry about which man to drag along.

Gotta bring a plus one...

Gotta bring a plus one…

There’s that, and there’s the fact that I don’t like the first man my mind thought up when I was told about my plus one. Him. My best guy friend who is sort of my ex and who is about to be my business partner. Yeah, he’s something alright, and I think he has enough titles already. Don’t get me wrong, he is an amazing guy. What bothers me is that HE is the one I thought about, the one guy I feel more comfortable with, the one guy I can talk to endlessly, the guy I’m completely honest with, the one guy I know who has a mixture of quite admirable traits all in one and that HE is the one guy that really gets me. So why don’t I want him to be my plus one? Because I don’t want him to be THAT guy. I have already made up my mind that he and I cannot have anything more. I don’t want to go down that road again with him. That’s why I’m not that happy that HE is the one who is that guy I wanna bring along when I need a plus one. it doesn’t sit well with me that the one guy I don’t want to have is the same guy who is currently my favorite guy. So yes I want to give out that title to some other guy!

I want to take somebody else to that party. I want somebody else to mean that much to me. Somebody other than him. That way I would not think twice about my earlier decision. That way, I would not let him further into my life. That way I wouldn’t get attached and emotionally involved with him. Yes I am not; and I’d like more than anything for it to stay that way. I do not like the fact that among all the guys I know, like and hang out with, he’s the one who tickles my fancy. I don’t want him to. So I am urging those other men out there to up there game. I’m urging another man out there to become somebody I would want. Somebody I could have. Somebody I would take to this party!

No I don’t want a relationship. Which got me thinking… Is he my favorurite because he feels safe? Like with him I can have the perfect boyfriend-girlfriend experience, but without the relationship pressure. (yes he’s that awesome. And this is me talking. I mean I’m not easy to please) Could it be that I haven’t given the others a chance? Or is it that I actually haven’t yet found another who piques my interest as much? Either way, I have till the 30th to get a guy I like enough to take to my cousin’s party! I want something new. Something Exciting. Somebody I like, one whose company I enjoy, and one we can have any sort of conversation with. The one with whom I will enjoy that day with, whether the party turns out to be fun or not! One who can handle- all of- me (I’m quite a handful why lie). Well, there’s this guy I met the other day after my interview…and then there’s this cute guy I have a huuuuge crush on but who… Nope. I won’t say no more.

I wonder who its gonna be...

I wonder who its gonna be…

So yes I am looking forward to the 31st because I wanna know who would be the guy I take to the Party!! I don’t know who it will be yet, but I know who it won’t be! 😉


let him go


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